I’m going to get a little candid this week, because truthfully, it was a mentally challenging week for me. First, it was the week back after a long vacation, and we all know how rough going back to reality can be. Second, less than 12 hours after we returned from our vacation, Dan had to leave for a work trip and I haven’t seen him in five days. That makes me sad. And finally, to add salt to the wound, my “Aunt Flo” was paying a visit this week. That may be more information than you asked for, but I’m laying it all out there. It was a rough week.

I’ve been pretty open and vulnerable on my blog about my experiences with anxiety, depression, and OCD. I’ve always believed that I feel my emotions a lot deeper than the average human, and when I’m sad, I’m SAD. It consumes me, and sometimes it can be hard to snap myself out of it. I’ve also mentioned in past blogs that for years I was on antidepressants to help control my consuming thoughts, and this week actually, marked two years since the last time I’ve taken any kind of medication for anxiety or depression. Which is huge! I’m proud of myself for sure, but I definitely wouldn’t have gone off the medication if I didn’t feel like I could handle it. And while for the most part, I do believe I’m in a better head space than I probably ever have been, that doesn’t mean I’m never going to have hard days. And they are far and few between, but when they do come, I have to figure out how to push myself through it.

This last Wednesday was ROUGH. From the moment my alarm went off that morning, my emotions were taking a roller coaster ride. I fought the urge to cry almost all day long, and I can’t even really tell you why, but I’m sure all the reasons I listed above played a pretty big part in the matter. I stayed in bed as long as I possibly could. And I know it sounds ridiculous, but really all I wanted was a hug from Dan, and he wasn’t there, so that made me even sadder. I just felt like a dark storm cloud floated above my head all day long.

And while it would have been easy to give in to my emotions and shut the world out for the day and stay in bed, I have responsibilities. And as much as I’d like to sometimes, I can’t use it as an excuse to not function as an adult. I just have to find ways to keep my mind occupied so I don’t focus on whatever is making me sad.

I poured myself into my work that day, and for the most part, it did help me keep my mind off it. There were times where I would be reminded of that storm cloud hanging around, and I’d just have to remind myself that whatever was making me sad, wouldn’t be there forever. It was a temporary feeling, and like it almost always has before, I knew it would get better.

It was a day I was particularly thankful for run club after work. Exercise has always been a great stress reliever for me, and doing it with friends made it even better to lift my spirits.

During my lunch break that day, I took some steak out of the freezer to thaw so I could make steak and potato bites for supper which is one of my favorite meals. I pretty much live to eat, so knowing good food is coming my way, always puts me in a better mood.

And when I was finally able to talk to Dan that night, it helped my mood significantly too. He has a way of making me smile even when I’m in a funk, and it’s exactly what I needed.

Exercise, giving myself something to look forward to, and surrounding myself with the right people are only a couple of examples of ways I’m able to push through those hard days. What do you do when you have that dark storm cloud following you around? We all have days like that, and we all have to push through. I encourage you to think about some of the ways you could make those hard days easier for you. It might make the next one just a tiny bit easier to get through.

If you need me, I’ll be cuddled up on my couch with my double D’s: Dan and Dobby, refilling my tank and preparing myself to have a better week.

Until next time! 🙂

Megan Reiffenberger